NIGHT BEFO' CRIZZMUS Wus da night afo' Crizzmus, and all thru da hood,
everybody be sleepin' and da sleepin' be good.
We hunged up our stockins, an hoped like all heck,
dat Obama he gunna brang all us our check. All of da family, was lay'in on da flo',
my sister wif her gurlfriend, my brother wif some ho.
Ashtrays was all full, empty beer cans and all
when I heared such a fuss, I thunk ," .. mus be da law". I
pulled th' sheet off da window and what did I see ?
I was spectin' the sherrif, wif a warrent fo' me.
But what I saw, made me say, "Lawd , look 'a dat!"
Here come a huge watermelon, pulled by 8 big-ass rats. Now ovah da years, Santy Claws he be white,
but it look like us brotha's got a black un' tonight.
Faster than a po'leese car, my homeboy he came,
Whupped-up on dem rats as he called dem by name. On Biden, On Jessie, On Pelosi and Hillary too;
On Fannie, On Freddie, On Ayers, and Slick Willy (who?)
Obama landed dat melon, right there in da street,
I knowed it
fo' sho' - can you believe that Shee'- it? Dat Santy didn't need no chimbley,
He picked da lock on my do'.
I sez to myself, "Son- o-a- bitch,
He done did dis befo!" He left me no presents, just started stealin my shit,
Got my guns and my crack, and my new burglers kit.
Den, wif my shit in his bag, out da windo' he flew,
I sho' woulda shanked him, be he snagged my blade too! Obama jumped back on dat melon, wif out even a hitch,
and waz gone in two seconds, dat Democrat
son-o-a-bitch.
So nex' year I be hopin', a white Santy we git,
'Cause a black Santy Claws, just ain't worf a shit!
