Dictionary For Decoding Women's Personal Ads

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:
* 40-ish................................49.
* Adventurous.....................Slept with everyone.
* Athletic...............................No breasts.
* Average looking....................Moooo.
* Beautiful...........................Pathological liar.
* Emotionally Secure................On medication.
* Feminist................................Fat.
* Free spirit............................Junkie.
* Friendship first......................Former slut.
* New-Age.............Body hair in the wrong places.
*
Old-fashioned.......................No BJs.
* Open-minded.......................Desperate.
* Outgoing..........................Loud and Embarrassing.
* Professional..........................Bitch.
* Voluptuous..........................Very Fat.
* Large frame.........................Hugely Fat.
* Wants Soul mate..................Stalker.