HOW TO TELL THAT YOU HAVE A BAD LAWYER
• During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.
• He tells you that his last good case was a 'Budweiser'.
• When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.
• He picks the jury by playing
"duck-duck-goose".
"duck-duck-goose".
• During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy.
• A prison guard is shaving your head.
• He places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table.
• He begins closing arguments with, "As Ally McBeal once said..."
• He keeps
citing the legal case of "Godzilla v. Mothra".
citing the legal case of "Godzilla v. Mothra".
• Just before he says, "Your Honor," he makes those little quotation marks in the air with his fingers.
• The sign in front of his law office reads "Practicing Law Since 2:25 pm".
• Whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge, "Whatever".
• Just before trial starts he whispers, "The judge is the one with the little hammer,
right?"
right?"
