LAWS
Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of the act.
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of the act.
Law of the Telephone:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss a flat tire made you late for work, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
If you tell the boss a flat tire made you late for work, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time)
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time)
Bath Theorem:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Theater Rule:
At any event, people with seats furthest from the aisle, arrive last.
At any event, people with seats furthest from the aisle, arrive last.
Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something that lasts until the coffee is cold.
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something that lasts until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Location:
Wherever you go, There you are!
Wherever you go, There you are!
Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you're talking about.
Anything is possible if you don't know what you're talking about.
Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product you really like, they will stop making it.
As soon as you find a product you really like, they will stop making it.
