FUN WAYS TO IRRITATE PEOPLE
* If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
* Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
* Practice making fax and modem noises.
* Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
* Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
* Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
* Staple papers in the middle of the page.
* Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
* Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
* As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
* Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce, "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
* Ask people what gender they are.
* While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
* Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
