Love vs Lust vs Marriage

LOVE vs. LUST vs. MARRIAGE

Love: When you take a bubble bath together
Lust: When you take a bath in Jell-O together
Marriage: When you give the kids a bath

Love: A romantic candlelight dinner for two
Lust: "Do I have to buy you dinner first?"
Marriage: 4 Happy Meals...to go

Love: Giving your love some candy
Lust: Thinking you are the candy
Marriage: Scraping candy off of the carpet

Love: A night out at the Symphony
Lust: A night out at the Ramada Inn
Marriage: A night out at Sesame Street On Ice

Love: Aroma -- French perfume
Lust: Aroma -- Brut aftershave
Marriage: Aroma -- "The baby needs changing..."

Love: Lending your jacket to your love when he/she is cold
Lust: "I can think of a way to stay warm..."
Marriage: Your teenager just took your jacket

Love: Talking and cuddling
Lust: Rolling over and falling asleep
Marriage: Getting up to wash your hands...

Love: Finding the "Fell in Love on AOL" chat-room
Lust: Finding the "Blonde Dominatrix" chat-room
Marriage: Finding the "Married and Looking" chat-room

Love: Long drives through the countryside
Lust: Long parking sessions at Lover's Lookout
Marriage: Long drives with the kids screaming in the back-seat

Love: Sex every night
Lust: Sex 5 times a night
Marriage: Sex ?
Love: When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
Lust: When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
Marriage: When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.

Love: When intercourse is called "makin love".
Lust: When intercourse is called "screwing."
Marriage: When intercourse is a town in Pennsylvania.

Love: When you argue over how many children to have.
Lust: When you argue over who gets the wet spot.
Marriage: When you argue over whose idea it was to have kids.

Love: When you share everything you own.
Lust: When you steal everything they own.
Marriage: When the bank owns everything.

Love: When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
Lust: When the relationship is over if you don't climax.
Marriage: When...uh...what's a climax?

Love: When you phone each other just to say, "Hi."
Lust: When you phone each other to pick a hotel room.
Marriage: When you phone each other to bitch about work.

Love: When you write poems about your partner.
Lust: When all you write is your phone number.
Marriage: When all you write is checks.

Love: When your only concern is for your partner's feelings.
Lust: When your only concern is to find a room with mirrors all around
Marriage: When you're only concern as to what's on TV.

Love: When you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.
Lust: When you only see each other naked.
Marriage: When you never see each other awake.

Love: When your heart flutters every time you see them.
Lust: When your groin twitches every time you see them.
Marriage: When your wallet empties every time you see them.

Love: When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
Lust: When the song on the radio determines how you do it.
Marriage: When you listen to talk radio.

Love: When breaking up is something you try not to think about.
Lust: When staying together is something you try not to think about
Marriage: When just getting through the day is your only thought.

Love: When you're only interested in doing things with your partner.
Lust: When you're only interested in doing things TO your partner.
Marriage: When you're only interested in your golf score.

Love: When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and talk.
Lust: When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and have sex.
Marriage: When a rainy day means it's time to clean the basement.

Love: You only leave the house to buy coffee and doughnuts.
Lust: You only leave the house to buy condoms and Vaseline.
Marriage: You only leave the house when you're allowed.