TOP 13 REJECTED COMMANDMENTS!
13. Thou shalt not snort cocaine off a stripper's ass.
12. Honor thy mother and father. Brothers and sisters are fair game.
11. Every vernal equinox, thou must shave thy genitals with a sharpened clamshell.
10. Thou shalt tip thy waitress with neither pennies nor coupons.
9. Every first-born son is the sole, exclusive property of the Lord thy God.
8. Thou shalt not suck the shit out of a dead monkey's asshole.
7. You're so vain, you probably think this commandment is about you.
6. Thou shalt neither drink of the bongwater, nor shalt thou piss in the bong.
5. Thou shalt not disembowel thy hostage without adequate justification.
4. Thou shalt not cook a goat in its mother's milk.
3. Thou shalt not be a 'playa hayta.'
2. Upon thy death, thou shalt become neither zombie nor vampire.
1. Thou shalt not be such a goddamn fucking asshole all the time.
