TOP TEN THINGS TO DO WITH 400,000 FROZEN EMBRYOS!
11. Sell them to the highest bidder.
10. Use them to cool down your beverage.
9. Ignore them.
8. Sprinkle some on your shoulders and you have a dandruff alternative for incredibly rich people who are unable to produce dandruff of their own.
7. Breed your very own Freak Show by nuking a dozen or so embryos in a microwave, then using a turkey-baster to shoot them up your retarded half-sister's cervix.
6. Get Colonel Sanders to make it an even dozen herbs and spices.
5. Use them as snow in a series snowglobes featuring highly disturbing locales (Dachau, WTC ground zero, Kabul).
4. Market and sell them as "pre-deceased" Sea Monkeys.
3. Three words: Frozen Embryo Porn!
2. Put them in a rocket and blast them into outer space and hope a benevolent alien civilization thaws them out and hatches them. This may well be humanity's last, best hope for survival.
1. Flush them down the fucking toilet. We've got enough natural-born assholes as it is.
