YOU MIGHT BE ADDICTED TO THE INTERNET IF...
* Tech Support calls "You" for help...
* You watch T.V. with the closed captioning turned on...
* You have called out someone's screen name while making love to your significant other...
* You keep begging your friends to get an account so "we can hang out"..
* Three words: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
* You want to meet a girl/guy and your first impulse is to turn on your computer...
* You've ever gotten onto an airplane just to meet some folks face to face...
* You have to get a second phone line just so you can call Domino's...
* You have ever joined "Si habla Espanol" (spanish chat room) "just to work on my spanish"...
* You've ever typed "drinking on-line is better than drinking alone"...
* You go into labor and you stop to type a special e-mail letting everyone know you are going to be away...
* You have a vanity car tag with your screen name on it...
* You no longer type with proper punctuation, capitalization, or complete sentences...
* You begin to say "LOL" instead of laughing...
* When someone says "What did you say?" you reply "Scroll up!"...
* You turn down the lights and close the blinds so people won't know you are on-line again...
* You know more about your on-line friends daily routines than you do your own spouse's...
* You change screen names so much that you have to get your profile to see who you are (identity crisis here)...
* You're broke, your modem burns out and you go out onto the streets to sell your body to get a new one...
* You open your home to 15 strangers for a week merely because they have computers and cool screen names...
* Your kids are standing at your side saying "mommy, please come cook dinner" and you would rather type another "LOL"...
* You marry your cyber boyfriend/girlfriend and you both sit at your own computers and chat to each other every night from across the room...
* You type messages to people while you are on the phone with them at the same time...
* You won't work at a job that doesn't have a modem involved...
* You have to ask what year it is...
* You are doing things more and more that you swore you would never, ever do when you first found chat...
* You name your pets after people you talk to on-line...
* You smile sideways...
* You have a map on the wall with red thumbtacks to mark where people you have met are...
* You look at an annoying person off-line and wish you had your ignore button handy...
* Being called a newbie is a *MAJOR* insult...
* You double click your tv remote...
* You can now type over 70 wpm...
* You go into withdrawals during dinner...
* You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to everyone in a room...
* You have gone into an unstaffed tech support room and ended up "giving" tech support to other USERS...
* You have to be pryed from your computer with the Jaws-of-Life...
* Your last sexual experience was really just a "textual" experience...
* You find yourself lying to others about your time on-line and when they complain that your phone was busy you claim it was off the hook...
* You have an identity crisis if someone else is using a screen name close to your own...
* You would rather tell people your bloodshot eyes are from partying too much instead of the truth (all night on-line)...
