Politically Correct

POLITICALLY CORRECT

* No one fails a class anymore, he's merely "passing impaired."

* You don't have detention, you're just one of the "exit delayed."

* Your bedroom isn't cluttered, it's just "passage restrictive."

* These days, a student isn't lazy. He's "energetically declined."

* Your locker isn't overflowing with junk, it's just "closure prohibitive."

* Kids don't get grounded anymore. They merely hit "social speed bumps."

* Your homework isn't missing, its just having an "out-of-notebook experience."

* You're not sleeping in class, you're "rationing consciousness."

* You're not late, you just have a "rescheduled arrival time."

* You're not having a bad hair day, you're suffering from "rebellious follicle syndrome."

* You don't have smelly gym socks, you have "odor-retentive athletic footwear."

* No one's tall anymore. He's "vertically enhanced."

* You're not shy. You're "conversationally selective."

* You don't talk a lot.. You're just "abundantly verbal."

* You weren't passing notes in class. You were "participating in the discreet exchange of penned meditations."

* You're not being sent to the principals office. You're "going on a mandatory field trip to the administrative building."

* It's not called gossip anymore. It's "the speedy transmission of near-factual information."

* The food at the school cafeteria isn't awful. It's "digestively challenged."
* In Pakistan if you switch loyalties you are not a turncoat, you are a PATRIOT.